The End of a Vivid Cuban Dream

For Sale at the Havana Airport


On Sunday of my dream, day 5, I basically came to the point were I became totally and utterly broke. Nonetheless, I still had a very good time and made the most of my broken experience. I felt what it must be like to be Cuban (at least the not having any money part of being Cuban). This is a much different experience then the tourist vibe. The differences are vast. By and large, I spent the last three days of my trip in my Casa Particular watching movies, working on ideas for future projects, and walking to and from cheap places to get food.



List of the movies I watched:

> Hotel Rwanda

> Gandhi

> Spiderman

> Casino Royale

> Pirates of the Carribean 2

> Apololypse Now (I WOULD NOT RECOMMEND WATCHING THIS RIGHT BEFORE BED)

If you would like to cry your eyes out for 2 solid straight hours immediately rent Hotel Rwanda with Don Cheedle. I have mentioned before that I "at times" can get a bit choked up at movies (laugh if you like but its the truth). While watching Hotel Rwanda, I literally lost it. Maybe it hit home as Rwanda has been on my list of places I really want to go (the Mountain Gorillas are there). I do not know. But, Jesus what a horrible story told in such an amazing way.

Gandhi was great too. However, I started watching it at 4am and I did not actually get to bed until 7:30am. Remember that I am in broken solitude and there is no reason to observe any normal sleeping patterns. After watching it I am really pumped to see as much of India as I can and I really have no interest whatsoever in going to Pakistan.

Sidenote: Although, does anyone have any interest in going to Pakistan????

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How did I manage to blow a cool G (US $1000) in 7 Days in my dream???

Balance sheet of the trip
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The Cuban Convertible Dollar (CUC) This is the money used by tourists

This is how I spent my money from what I can recall.

I started with $1000 US Dollars

The Cuban CUC (tourist dollar) is stronger than the US dollar. I think the dollar is .89 to the CUC.

After exchanging money I had $900 US left out of the $1000(This is why I constantly bitch about the weak US dollar and how it kills me while I am traveling).

>First Night 5 Star Hotel: $160 dollars
>6 nights in Casa Particular w/ Breakfast: $240
>5 days on the Internet : $40 (clearly Im addicted to the Internet)
>Buying drinks for French dude: $45
>Buying drinks for Cubans: $40
>Two books about Hemmingway: $15
>Eating at decent places: $80
>Eating at shitty places: $20
>3 delightful Cuban Cigars: $30
>15 Mojitos at Hemmingway Bars: $65
>5 Daiquiris at Hemmingway Bars:$25
>Lots of Buckanaroo Beer: $40
>Cab fare to and from Airport: $50
>Misc Cab fare: $50

So, as you can see from the above report there were three problems in Cuba:

1. It was more expensive than what I though it would be. This holds true especially with transportation costs, internet costs, Mojitos, and lodging (although I did stay in really nice places)

2. I really like Mojitos.

3. I am complete idiot.

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Just me and my Macbook

There is something to be said for being completely alone on the road. It is a unique experience as opposed to traveling with friends. It is not at all easy to meet other backpackers in Cuba as there is no formal hostel setup. So, for my week in Cuba (dreaming) I was by myself for most of the adventure. I did meet a few cool people along the way and definitely had a good time. However, a vast majority of my time has been spent alone. It was just me, my laptop, and my thoughts.

However, I am really happy with the thoughts and plans that I put together in Cuba during my last few days there. I am obsessed with the vision I have for my future travels and have had some time to map out a rough plan for when I return back to the states to try and make things happen. Its invigorating and I am excited to get back home to get to advance my ideas.

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A Final Thought on My Cuban Dream


The bottom line is that this time warp is not going to be around forever. When Cuba opens up its not going to be another revolution, it i;s going to be an economic EXPLOSION! This is only my opinion but I think Havana makes Miami look like a goat farm (alright, maybe not a goat farm but its nicer in Havana). There are 300 beaches in Cuba. Its just such a beautiful place. I wish I had the time and money to see more of it. Although I would personally hate to see a McDonalds in downtown Central Havana, the amount of money that will flow into Cuba when Fidel kicks the bucket should really help the Cuban people. I think that 10 years from now there will be a lot less 15 year old prostitutes. In my mind that's a pretty good thing.

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The Boys have moved on to bigger and better things in the US of A

The BV Show and the Weapon have officially thrown in the towel on this round of traveling. Something happened to the BV shows house and he is in dire need of making money. The Weapon has reported to work in Fort Lauderdale. He is going to be a dive instructor on a ridiculous boat cruising the world. The luxury yacht that he will be working on is currently in the Mediterranean. Dave is waiting to find out if he will be flown to the South of France or to Italy to meet up with the boat. I wish him the best of luck. He told me that the boat has plans to come back to South America. Its actually going to be docked in Rio for Carnival. That...should be crazy!

The BV show arrived in Baltimore yesterday where he will be working construction and hopefully will get a job in a bar somewhere. My family and friends are taking good care of him until my triumphant return in a little more that two weeks. I am looking forward to introducing Ben to everyone when I get back into town. He should end up being in Baltimore until late October when he heads off to Canada for the ski season.

Benny and I started traveling the first day of both of our trips on January 9th. Over the past 7 months we have split up and met back up three or four times. I think all in all, we traveled together for about 4 and 1/2 months. 99% of which were really, really good times.

When I found out the boys would not be waiting for me in Cartegena I was pretty bummed. Nonetheless, everyone has to do what they have to do. Funds tend to get scarce when traveling for an extended period of time like this.

However, I am really excited to see Jess (Aus) and Lisa (NY, USA) in Cartegena. "The boys" will be officially be replaced by "the girls". That my friends, is not all together a bad thing. Jess and I met in Bolivia and hung out in Cusco a bit. I met Lisa in Cusco and we traveled back into La Paz together (reference: 24 hours in the life of a backpacker post). I cannot wait to see them. I think I will end up finishing up the last of my South American adventures with them.

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Notes:




> I just finished reading Killing Pablo. I think it was a pretty good book to read right before visiting Colombia. Its about the Colombia Police and CIA working together to track and kill Pablo Escobar (biggest druglord ever). He spent years blowing up things, assinating people, and terrorizing Colombia. From what I gather, Colombia is a much more stable country presently. The vibe on the gringo trail is that Colombia is AMAZING. I cannot wait to experience it.

Pablo Escobar...Thankfully he is very dead as of 1992.


> ADMINISTRATIVE: If you still have not subscribed to DaveFordDoesEarth I HATE YOU. Its very easy. It is much easier than trying to write about Cuban history in an interesting fashion. Simply write your name in the top right hand column of the blog under the picture of me with my gay rolled up sleeve in the Galapagos. Then, you have to click on the email they send you. After subscribing, you will get emails of the blog whenever I post. Its pretty awesome so DO IT! I DO NOT REALLY HATE YOU, I LOVE YOU! I am way off of my goal of 10,000.

> Thanks to Matt Maikala for spreading the word about "Dave Ford Does Earth"through his 800 friends on Myspace. Thanks to Raji Taj in London for spreading the word to his 450 friends on Facebook. Who else??? Lemme think... Thanks to God, My family, Ray Charles, Jesus, Buddah, John Coltraine, Yoda, Nancy Kerrigan, and Bob Sagat. Thanks to my friend Noah in Egypt for telling her friends in the travel industry about my blog. Thanks to anyone that has forwarded on the blog, the Antarctica video, or told anyone about what I am doing. Thanks so much. Oh, and thanks for the 50 emails I got after sending out the Antarctica video footage via email.

Thanks again to Paul Bell from the Lonely Planet for doing such an amazing job with the Polar Plunge footage. Thanks to the Lonely Planet for featuring it. Also, muchos gracias to the country of Bolivia for helping me to lose 20 pounds since that footage was taken. I cannot believe I was that fat. Oh, and thanks to my friend Carol in Brazil for lending me her Bikini.

Sidenote: If I would not have been wearing the boxer shorts it would have been an X rated video. Believe me it would have been NO BUENO!

If you have not watched my ridiculous Antarctica Polar Plunge video on the Lonely Planet.tv website click on this link, or copy paste it into your web browser as blogger seems to be very shitty at highlighting my links for some reason. However, before watching remember that I am neither bearded or fat any longer. It takes a bit to buffer. I really hate buffering.

It will be listed as an link to this blog post as well.

http://www.lonelyplanet.tv/Clip.aspx?key=F75EDDAF628D20C4

A Vivid Cuban Dream- Part Deux

Vivid Cuban Dream Days 1-4

Washington DC.. Or wait a second... Havana, Cuba....


I started out my dream (for those of you that know me well) in true Dave Ford fashion at the five star Parque Grande Hotel in the best part of Havana.

Sidenote: This proved to be dumb. Not just a little bit dumb but extremely, idiotically dumb. Also, I am extremely bad with money. And by extremely, I mean I might be the worst person at handling money in the entire world.

Everything in Cuba revolves around money. When you are American everything revolves around you "NOT" having access to any money.

So, in the first four days of my dream I spent a ton of money. I brought $1000 bucks (in my dream) thinking that it would plenty. After traveling for the last 6 and a half months in South America I though that I would have some sort of an idea about how much everything would cost. I was "as wrong as the day is long".

Right off the bat, I went up to the rooftop posh pool and had a nice $15 dollar CUC lunch and a few Mojitos. This cost me about $20 bucks US. Sadly, this was only the beginning.

I had a few buckanaroos on my trip as well.


After buying a nice Cohiba cigar I decided to walk around the town and soak everything in. Right after leaving my hotel room I met a French guy that works as a writer for a French Radio Station. He is assigned in Cuba for two years or until Fidel dies. He was a great guy and needed to interview an "anonymous American" for a story he was working on. Apparently, I was the 73rd tourist that he had asked if they were American. He was pretty happy to have found me. I told him to say my name was "Lenny".

We hit it off and he gave me a tour of "Havana Vieja". We hit up a few of Hemmingway's old haunts (Hemmingway spent about 30 years of his life in Cuba and liked to drink...ALOT). So, being the idiot that I am I decided that I would pay our $45 dollar tab. Nonetheless, I learned a lot about what is going down in Cuba in my first 2 hours on the island and am really glad I met the guy.

This is hanging in Hemmingways Mojito bar. He had different bars for different drinks. The Floridita was his Dacquari Bar.

Sidenote: About 30 journalists from all over the world are stationed in Havana right now. They are all waiting, some anxiously, for Fidel to die.

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The next day I checked into my very nice "Casa Particular" in Vendado, a small upscale part of the city of Havana. As I mentioned in my last post, the Casa is owned and operated by two very nice Cubans Esteban and Barbara. I ended up staying for the entire rest of my dream in "a room in there house". The room cost me $40 per night with a nice breakfast included in the morning. Estaban and Barbara and there staff were extremely nice and took very good care of me.

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The Feel = 1957



The cars were amazing. On every corner you would see people working on their 1955 Chevys.

In reality, my dream took place in 1957. Elvis should have been playing on the radio. Cuba is a living, breathing time warp. The buildings, the cars, the restaurants, and pretty much everything else is preserved like a fetal pig in a jar of formaldihyde from 49 odd years ago (sorry, that was a weird analogy but you get the point). Although, much of Cuba is falling apart. Would a pig in a jar of formaldahyde fall apart after 50 years? I am not sure. I really need to get away from this analogy.

Note to Self: I have not the slightest clue how to spell formalydahyde. What a tough word. I need to start writing easier words to spell. In fact, I do not think I will ever have the ability to spell it correctly. It is beyond my capacity. Spell check does not even know how to spell it. I bet those spelling bee geeks can spell it though. God I hate those kids.

One thing that has really hit me hard is just how safe you feel walking the streets of Havana. Let me put it this way, in parts of Baltimore City and Washington DC where I am from I have walked (not intentionally) and driven through some pretty rough spots. The same dilapidated 1950's feel that you get in Havana is present. There are so many resounding similarities. Building are falling apart. People are trying to get money from you constantly. There are a ton of people on the street drinking. 90% of the faces that you see are people from African descent. Walking down these streets in Cuba, you feel completely 100% safe. If I was in a similar neighborhood in SE Washington DC I would running for my life.

So what contributes to this? My answer is lack of "crack cocaine" and "Heroin"in Cuba.

Is this "one" benefit of Communism???? My answer is a resounding "YES".



So, back to the feel. Old men play sit around and play chess in the parks for hours. The Kids play marbles in the street and throw around the baseball all day. As seen above, fishing in Havana Harbor is immensely popular.

It really does feel like what it must have been like 50 years ago. Its like a "Leave it to Beaver" episode. Teenagers line the streets and hang out in small, unthreatening groups. When I would walk through the streets I would see literally hundreds of people sitting on their porches. Many, many people gather nightly around the harbor (which is surprisingly clean for a city of two million and the kids swim in it). Simply put, there are probably zero Sony Playstations in the entire country. All in all I am not sure if that is such a bad thing.

The one thing that people seem to have is an endless supply of time. Just watching Estaban and Barbara interact daily was an eye opener for me. They have so much time for each other and their family. Now, they are no doubt a part of a Cuban upper class (yes, there is a class structure). I am sure things are slightly different for poorer Cubans. Nonetheless, things are so slow and so laid back and chill. The vibe is one of relaxation. Its not hard to fall right into the slow, laid back way of life.

People walk around the streets with beers, talk, joke, and hang out. I did not see a single sense of urgency during my entire dream. There is no need to rush for anything.

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The American Embassy (If that is what you want to call it)

There are almost 300 Americans working in the US building pictured above. The Cuban Government decided to have some fun. They took the parking lot from the US and put up all of these flags. I have heard mixed reports about the building. Most of the stories lead me to believe that at one time the US government tried to put American or Anti Castro propaganda on the exterior of the building. Therefore, the Flags were Cubas response. The building is also surrounded entirely by the Cuban Police.

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The People in my Dream

Simply put, the people in Cuba LOVE Americans. Whenever I talked to any of the Cubans I had met and told them where I was from their eyes would just light up. Almost everyone that I talked to have some sort of extended family in either Miami or New York. The feeling between our two governments have nothing whatsoever to do with the attitude of the people.

In one of my daily encounters, I was approached by a professional baseball pitching coach that over a Mojito asked me for money because his baby had a club foot or a broken leg (my Spanish sucks and they speak differently here, but something was wrong with his kids leg). If this guy was coaching in the US he would be a millionaire. Oh, and this was not a scam (I do not think). I gave him 10 bucks and he almost started crying. He was visibly shaken.

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Some notes about the bad and interesting things I noticed. There were a ton of them.

> Hookers make more money than doctors. This had led to many of the doctors in Cuba to be used as actual national exports. Many of Cubans doctors are "traded" to Venezuela for extreme reductions in the cost of Oil.

> The Police are literally on every corner. They severely monitor how much the locals talk to the tourists. For example, if you sat down on a park bench and talked to a local for 10 minutes, after you left the Police would then come up and ask the local many questions about your conversations and such.

>>At one point I walked by a store that rations out bread. They seem to be always running out of things. Cuba, being a huge sugar exporter, should not run out of sugar. Right??? Well, for the last three days of my stay at the Casa they could not buy any sugar and I had to drink my coffee black. However, the one thing they never run out of is booze. It seemed like everyone was constantly drinking. There are Rum stands on every other corner.



> All of the billboards that I have seen in Havana have one of two people on them, Fidel Castro or Che Guervera. Imagine what is going to happen when Coca Cola and Toyota can start advertising in Cuba.

> The average monthly salary of a Cuban is $12 dollars. They have to find extra ways to make money after there daily salaries. On one day of my dream, I met a Cuban couple and bought them a few beers. I must have been a bit drunk because I was communicating pretty well with them in Spanish and they did not know a lick of English. Anyway, they were talking about how much they made per month compared to what it would cost them to buy a pair of shoes. For a cheap pair of shoes for their 3 year old, it still costs 30 bucks. So, when both parents only make a combined 24 dollars a month things simply do not add up.

> The lines are long, slow, and everywhere. I feel like the entire country works like the Motor Vehicle Administration (MVA) in the states. It can be really frustrating. My patience was constantly put to the test.



> The above picture represents the local book market. This is pretty much the selection you get to choose from if you would like to buy a book in Cuba. I really wanted to read Hemmingway but could not find anything in English. However, all of Fidels books were for sale translated in English. Not surprising.
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How could I not have a Big Night Out in Cuba?

Yeah, so Saturday night of my Cuban adventure was my "ONE BIG NIGHT OUT". I saved up extra money and was ready to tie one on in a big way. Well, that was before I realized that 90% of the bars in Havana close at midnight and the ones that are open are all crawling with 15 year old hookers which is not exactly what I am into. I like 19 year old hookers. (JUST A JOKE MOM).

Sidenote: Cuba has a serious prostitution problem. However, the girls do not seem to be hooked on drugs like they are almost everywhere else. I think it all goes back to the $12 a month average salary in the Country. People in Cuba do whatever they have to do to make extra cash. It is a very sad aspect of life under communist rule (where travel is permitted as I am sure this does not happen in North Korea). I have heard that a lot of creeps travel to Cuba just for access to the cheap, young girls.

I did have some good news on my night out as I got my pocket picked for the third time on this trip. Why is this good news you may be asking yourself? Well, it is because I caught the asshole in the act. My slick travel skills were apparently too much for the suspected thief to handle. I got loud, angry, and up in the dudes face. 10 seconds later my wallet reappeared on the ground.

Note to self: If you are in any other big city in the world do not respond with the same antics as you will probably be knifed.

Sidenote: All I had in my wallet was a condom and 10 "daveforddoesearth.com" business cards. Maybe I would have prevented the spread of some terrible disease and gotten 10 new readers if I just would have let him have it.

Still, after getting pick-pocketed twice before I cannot contain my sense of pride for actually preventing it. Ironically, I did not even have enough money to buy a new wallet.

While violent crime is virtually non-existent, there are unfortunately a lot of reports of petty crime.

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Completely running out of Cash is "NO BUENO".

I have walked more in my time in Cuba than I have for the entire duration of my trip. I think that I am as skinny as I have been in the last few years (if you can believe that after seeing the Polar Plunge Video). I just did not have any money for cabs. Each day I bet I walked 4 miles. Transportation costs are one of the ways they really stick it to tourists.

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Notes:

>Anyways, this dream of mine to visit Cuba happened with the encouragement of a very good friend and mentor of mine who has actually had similar dreams 9 times. So, he helped me prepare for what I would encounter in my Cuban dreamland.

> I had a bit of a scam working (that I am quite proud of) with the first hotel I stayed in. I went there everyday pretending like I was still residing there. Then, walking in like I owned the place, I would push the elevator button and head up to the 9th floor, 5 star, rooftop pool. It is actually quite easy and my tan has immensely improved since arriving in Cuba. In general, I have decided that I am going to walk around like I own whatever place I am in from now on. Its a good practice.



> The above picture represents the dream car I want for my triumphant return. If anyone knows anyone that wants to sell one cheap, please email me.

> Also, let me take this opportunity to one more time reiterate the fact that I was not actually in Cuba. This was all a dream. Are you getting sick of the "dream" references yet? I know I am.

A Vivid Cuban Dream- Part One

I had a dream I was in Havana Cuba.It was remarkably vivid. It was almost as if I was actually there. So, I decided to write about it. Everything that you read in these next three posts were all a part of a crazy dream. I met so many people, smelled the air, walked through the streets, smoked the cigars, drank the Mojitos, went to a museum, and got a tan.

This amazingly vivid dream lasted for 7 days. The first few days were much different then the last three. Mostly, because during the last three days of this dream I did not have "ANY" money.

Honestly, I had a lot of trouble writing these posts. Most of my extreme hardships came while trying to figure out how to divide my experiences with the history of Cuba. In the end, I decided to split it up into three posts.

Post 1: This one... My Rough interpretation of the recent and not so recent History of Cuba

Post 2: The first four days of my dream in Havana

Post 3: The last three days of my dream in Havana "broke as a joke" in my hotel room.

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As normal, as I sit here and write, I am listening to Kid A, my favorite Radiohead album. Currently, I am sitting in a house in "Cuba" on the patio surrounded by furniture, pictures, and statuettes that could fill up an Antique shop. Literally, in the United States this stuff would sell for a great deal of money. For the last 6 days of my dream I stayed here. It is called a Casa Particular and is run by a very nice family. Esteban, Barbara and there staff have been great to the American with crazy hair.

The Casa Particular

Sidenote: Radiohead is a great band to listen to while writing because its impossible to understand any of Tom Yorks lyrics.

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Its a good thing that this all was a dream because the US government has had travel restrictions in place since the early 1960's to prevent US citizens from spending money in the Cuban Economy.

Little does anyone know that (in my dream) its easier to get in and out of Cuba for an American then it is to get on a plane and travel from Washington DC to LA.

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So, as I earlier stated, I had a lot of trouble writing these posts. However, I do not think that you can talk about Cuba without talking about the complex and important history surrounding the island.

This being said, I realize that 98% of the general public of the world would rather clean the bathroom at McDonalds than read about history. So, I have decided to attempt to make this as painless and short as possible. Nonetheless, el historio de Cuba es mas imporante and thats why I am here. I mean dreaming about this.

I have been reading about this shit all week. Some of it I knew, some I did not! I have also talked to quite a few people to help formulate my thoughts.

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So here goes: "DaveFordDoesEarths'"

"Brief History of a Little Tropical Isle called CUBA"


Hmmm....Lets start with Cuba's historical chief export.....

Back in the day (and still today), there was/is lots of sugar in Cuba and henceforth it became a very important place for Spain to colonize a very, very, very long time ago. In addition, it also became a very important place for the United States because everyone knows that everyone in the US likes sugar a whole, whole lot.

Late 1890's:

Actually the US tried to buy Cuba from Spain twice but the Spanish were not in the selling mood. This was unlike the stupid French who sold the US everything west of the Mississippi and the stupid Russians who sold the US Alaska respectively for the price of a house in modern day New York City (I am not sure if thats correct but it was really cheap). I think Alaska was sold for a million bucks.

So, the Spanish would not sell, Cuba eventually wanted independence, the Spanish blew up an American boat docked in Havana harbor (The Cubans today say that the US blew up the boat to start the war), and all parties involved eventually participated in something we like to call "the Spanish American war".


The US Maine blowing up


The US and Cuba won and drove out the Spanish.

Cuba retained autonomy but the US remained involved for around 60 years in the day to day affairs of Cuba.

Sidenote: Right after the Spanish American war in the early 1900's is when the US set up its base in Guantanamo Bay.

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Al Capone

1920's

The United States of America got some religious folks in political office and they passed a law referred to as "Prohibition" where booze becomes totally illegal overnight.

Now, everyone knows that Americans like their booze. So, lots of people were very pissed off about this law.

At the same time there were two intelligent yet dangerous opportunists that would thrive financially because of Prohibition. These two people were in the bootlegging industry and there names were Al Capone and Lucky Luciano.

They though if booze was illegal in the US they might as well set up shop in a poor yet beautiful country just 90 miles off of the coast of Florida. So, overnight Cuba became a vacation destination for a whole lot of Americans who had money and wanted to get hammered, gamble, and dabble in prostitution a bit (think Las Vegas, without the desert). This was usual mob stuff ( The scenes in the Godfather 2 in Cuba are all based on real events). Basically, the mob was doing the same thing in Cuba that they eventually did in Las Vegas.

Sidenote: Personally, I find mob history fascinating.

So, Now we have a corrupt little third world country with ALOT of money flowing into the pockets of its leaders. This goes on for years but conditions are not good for the everyday person. The money does not trickle down to the common folk.

I think I am going to jump around a bit now, bear with me...

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1940s-1960ish

Then WW2 happens and ends, the Soviets put up the Berlin wall, and Communism begins to flourish around the world. All kinds of bad shit is happening with the governments in South American and this smart, revolutionary dude named Fidel Castro decided there needs to be a change in his native country of Cuba which at the time is hopelessly corrupt and influenced by the mob.

He actually runs for President but the regime in power cancels the elections. So, he and a small group of guys (one of them is Che Guevera, an Argentine doctor who is on plenty of T-shirts now a days) make it happen by the means of a full on revolution. (this is simplified vastly, there were years of fighting, struggle, executions,etc).



In the end, the rebels led by Fidel get the common people behind them and overthrow the corrupt mafia infiltrated regime of President/Dictator Batista.

Anyhoo, So Fidel and his band of merry Marxists take Cuba. Corrupt President Batista (who personally dealt with all the mobsters) is exiled and takes about 40 million in US bills on his way out of town to Mexico.

This all went down in the late 1950's.

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Late 1950's early 1960's:

Now here is where the real problems start with the US of A.



Mr. Castro is a pure Marxist and sympathizes with everything and anything communist and socialist. Henceforth, he starts nationalizing (making private industry and property, public industry and property) things in typical socialist fashion. First the phone companies go, then the electric companies, followed by a large number of the lucrative sugar mills. Eventually all land and private property all fall under the ownership of the state as well. The government now owns everything and Cuba is a true Socialist state. Fidel, Che, and the boys literally nationalized every single business in the country.

Now, 80 percent of the property and business' they nationalized were owned by private and public interests in take a guess what country... You got it right !!!! " the United States of America"!!!!

DING DING DING!!!!!!!

BANG!

A full on Trade Embargo is put into place. The US will not do any business with Cuba. Period. End of Story. Furthermore, in 1961 the US government put travel restrictions in place that are still in effect today to prevent US citizens from traveling to Cuba (again, thank God this was only a dream).

Sidenote: According to the Lonely Planet, in 2001 of Maine was the first US state that passed an official referendum to lift all travel restrictions to Cuba. YOU GO MAINE!!!!

Where were we... Oh yes, now Cubas biggest trading partner (the US) for the past God knows how many years (who is also in the thralls of the cold war against the Soviets) has completely cut them off.

So, Castro is pissed, his economy is in the shitter, and out of urgent need and political strategy starts trading heavily with the Russians. In fact, I think 85 percent of all the trade is with the Russians at one point.

Also, at the same time the US has nuclear missiles aimed at Russia throughout Europe. The Russians being crafty bastards, strike a deal with Fidel in 1962 and start setting up missiles in "CUBA" 90 miles away from the US coast. They are in striking distance of an important little American city called " Washington DC".




Oops... Forgot something Mas Importante..



Before the Cuban Missile Crisis in 1961 President Kennedy sponsored a major league "F" up called the "Bay of Pigs" invasion where 1400 Cubano dissidents were mounted together to try and overthrow Castros' regime. Castro and his crew slaughtered these poor bastards who were trained by the CIA.

Politically, this was NO BUENO for now beloved President Kennedy. I wonder if he was banging Marilyn Monroe around the same time?

So, back to the Cuban Missal Crisis: It was hands down the closest the world has ever come to nuclear holocaust. It happened in the early 60's. Eventually Kennedy and Russian President Khrushchev strike up a deal to avoid the possible end of the world. The Ruskies agree to pull their missiles out of Cuba and in turn the US agrees to never, ever, ever, ever invade Cuba. Castro is not consulted at all about any of this and is PISSED. History regards this as one of Kennedy's finest moments.

From what I know the "US NO ATTACK CUBA" agreement still stands today.

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Late 1980's to Present Day

The Cold War ends in 1989 when I was 11 years old. Between 1962 and 1989 the Russians and US fund and participate in a whole bunch of wars that are more or less Communism vs Capitalism, or Socialism vs Democracy, or good vs evil (probably what President Bush would call it). You can call it whatever you want.

Some examples are the Viet Nam War, The Iran Iraq War in the early 80's, the Russians Invasion of Afghanistan, and lots, and lots, and lots, lots, of skirmishes in Africa, South America, and Central America. By and large the US funded groups trying to overthrow Leftist Marxist and the Russians funded groups that tried to fight or overthrow rightist capitalists.

Bored Yet??? I hope not... Because there is more to come and believe me I have left quite a bit out to prevent extreme historically induced boredom.

In addition to the Soviet/ US involvement, Fidel sent hundreds of thousands of Cubans all over the world to help and aid regimes and rebels trying to promote communism. Che Guevara was killed while fighting with leftist Bolivian rebels trying to overthrow their democratic government in the late 60's.

Sidenote: This made Che a Martyr. I have an incredibly difficult time spelling the word Martyr.

Off Topic Sidenote: I had a dream that I was playing lead guitar for Pink Floyd the other night. A "dream" within a dream. VERY WEIRD! Ironically, we were playing "the Wall" and I do not know how to play guitar. It was stressful but somehow I nailed it! Then I woke up and I was in Cuba. I remember that our backup singers were hot. I do not know if they were Cuban though. They probably were.

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OK... So, I am jumping around a little here but you will get the point. I need to get back on track...

So, history pretty much proves over time that Capitalism and Democracy work better than Communism and Socialism and we are at the crucial point in history where the Berlin Wall comes toppling down in 1989.

Now, there is this little country 90 miles south from the worlds only remaining superpower that still is not budging even after the Soviet Union (its biggest ally) falls and the Eastern Block splits apart. As a result Cuba has serious, serious economic issues

Today Cuba is one of two remaining "truly" communist countries in the world (I am not counting China as I regard them as pseudo-Communist). North Korea is of course communist. However, there is "0" travel to North Korea which is an important distinction with Cuba. Cuba is flooded with upscale snotty Europeans. It is certainly not the friendly backpacker scene I am used to.

Nonetheless, Cuba is one of two places in the entire world still working under this antiquated system of government that simply does not work (although there are some advantages as I ll report in the next post). It also has been a centerpiece of world history for the last 49 years. That my friends is why having this dream was so important to me.

Also, no one knows exactly how much longer this is all going last as Fidel is "apparently" on his deathbed at the ripe old age of 81.

So, this whole dream was a now or never sort of deal for me. I decided on "Now".

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End of History Lesson: At this point you might be saying if I wanted to know all of this I would have read an Encyclopedia not some Jackass' blog.

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Notes:

> So, I know a lot of people think that history is boring. Nonetheless, thats what this dream is all about. Its a living, breathing, thinking, walking, talking, expensive history lesson. The crazy thing is what the next chapter of Cuban history is going to be all about. We are on the last pages of this chapter. That much is for sure in my mind.

> I like history and feel like I know a fair bit. However, I would like to put out a call to any history buffs or people that are much smarter than me: There has to be at least a slim possibility that some of what I have reported is off a bit or maybe even completely wrong (highly doubtful though). Please let me know by commenting. Click the tab below and comment away.

> I want everyone to know that I love my country (I do not love my current President). In fact, most people are surprised when I tell them that I spent 6 years in the Air Force Reserves (I do not remember if I have written about this before). While doing so, I had the glamorous, prestigious, and very important job job of driving extremely large forklifts. Do not be fooled. These were LARGE, IMPORTANT forklifts. My driving skills were nothing short of fantastic. My Dad also spent 3 years in the Army in the mid 1960's and one year in Viet Nam.

> All of this is especially interesting to me after spending so much time in Bolivia. Bolivian President Evo Morales and Venezuelan President Hugo Chavez are taking many of the same nationalization steps that Fidel took 45+ years ago.

Sidenote: Personally, I feel like both Presidents are idiots for nationalizing everything. But, wow did I love my travels in Bolivia. I really miss it.

> The next two posts are about the vastly different first four days and last three days that I had in Cuba. I will no doubt have to come back to the history in the above post, hence why I felt the urge to write it. Its also cool how when given the need to write about history how entrenched it becomes in your brain. So, at the least, I learned a lot researching all of this.

Sleepy seals and expensive deals in the Galapagos Islands

The Galapagos Island is one of the worlds most treasured places. It is a one and a half hour flight from southern Ecuador. In every guidebook you come across its listed as one of the most important places in South America. However, let me be clear, this trip was wicked expensive. The three of us all threw the budget out the window when making the decision to make this trip a reality. We each paid $2100 US for an 8 day cruise. I think thats more moolah than I spent in 2 months in Bolivia.

Our faithful vessel. The Spondylus

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The Cast of Characters
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The beloved group shot. The Israelis are not pictured for some reason.

3 Backpackers- Ben, Dave, and I were as we anticipated the only backpackers on the boat. We thought from the get go that our antics would win over the other passengers. We were hoping to set some sort of mood that would otherwise not be present. By the end of the trip we think we accomplished our goal. Benny and I shared a cabin for the trip (The BV Show snores very loudly). Dave got the lucky draw and his own room for the 8 days.

2 Israelis- The mother and daughter on the trip are Orthodox Jews from Israeli. I do not think either of them smiled the entire time we were traveling. Actually, they did smile on the last day. To summarize, the crew was not thrilled with the special meals they needed to prepare. They even had to bring there own cooking pans. I guess this is so that their food would not be prepared in the same pans with non kosher foods. I am not sure about the dietary rules of the Orthodox. Holy, the daughter, just graduated from Med School. Mom did not say a word to us the entire time. Nonetheless, the daughter took some good pictures of us jumping off of the boat (see below). She also helped Ben with some medical advice when his ear went completely numb (which was pretty weird as it did not hurt but he could not feel his left ear at all).

We jumped off of the boat... ALOT. Furthermore, I have put alot of really bad pix of the BV show in this blog. I feel its about time he deserved a cool one. However, do not be alarmed, I will continue to post gay pix of Benny whenever I get the chance.

2 Americans from San Fransisco- John is a photographer and owns a computer fixing business in Cali. His wife teaches 2nd grade ( I think, either that or I could be making that up). I think John is going to post all of his pix from the trip on his website. At one point he took over 49 pictures of one Iguana. However, the Iguana did not move the entire time. I will be sure to post some Iguana pix as soon as he uploads them. We had a good time with John. He was a really interesting guy.

2 Americans from New York- Josh is a published poet. They are both newlyweds on there honeymoon. They were romantically connected the entire time.

Note to readers: For me personally, I would not recommend the Galapagos as a honeymoon destination. That is, unless seeing thousands of birds would act as some sort of aphrodisiac for you. If thats the case you should take your new bride/groom immediately.

2 Bird People- Phil and Jesse are in Ecuador catching and banding small birds for some scientific purpose as to which I have no comprehension. Jesse is studying to get her doctorate in Ornithology and she is doing research for her thesis. We all really hit it off with Phil and Jesse. They are good people.

Mother and Son- Jackie is Jesse's mom, Will is Jesses brother. They are from California. They all took a family trip together. I am not sure if Jackie appreciated our antics like the rest of the boat. We were talking about our experience with Ayahuasca and I am not sure if she quite got it. Although, I am pretty sure my Mom did not quite get it either. Will hung out with us quite a bit and joined us jumping off the boat at times.

The Ecuadorian Couple- Augusto and his wife Daisy do not speak English. However, Daisy did call the BV show the devil "El Diablo" when he accidentally spotted a German girl from a different boat that had her boob accidentally pop out of her bathing suit. The German girl did not realize this for a good long time. Ben saw it first and quickly alerted Dave and I. Daisy was sitting next to us and found this amusing. This proved to be one of the trip highlights. However, the BV show has now been dubbed the El Diablo show.

Sidenote: An Errant boob is the quickest way in nature to get three guys laying on the beach to get up from there lounging positions as fast as possible. I am not 100% sure but I will venture to say that this naturally occurring phenomenon has something to do with Darwins evolutionary theories.

Dutch Chick- Inge is traveling solo and spent much time drinking and playing cards with us. We are not sure but there was a suspicion that there might have been a budding romance with our guide Fernando. This is unconfirmed. Inge, if you read this please comment on the comment page and let us know if anything happened. We love the gossip.

Fernando our guide- Fernando is 25 and Ecuadorian. He told many bad jokes but by and large was a good guide. His overall demeanor was jolly. He had a lot of knowledge of the identification of the Flora and Fauna. However, that was about it. Nonetheless, he was very likable. We had a good time with him. The BV show and I "fired" him whenever we did not see any of the promised wildlife. Then, when something good happened we would quickly rehire him.


According to our guide Fernando, this baby sea lion was bitten by a Galapagos shark

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Day 1

I will hereby dub day 1 of the Galapagos Island trip hurry up and wait day. It felt like my days in the US Airforce. Lots of hurry ups followed by lots of waits. Anyone that has ever been in the military will know what I mean.



When we finally got settled in we got to see the giant Galapagos Tortoises.

Before getting on the boat, Ben, Dave, and I felt like we were in an episode of "supermarket sweep". We cleared out the place in fear that the boat would gauge us with beer, wine, and soda charges. A couple hundred bucks later, we had procured 12 bottles of wine, 3 bottles of vodka, 1 bottle of 12 year old Chivas Regal, 4 tubes of Pringles, 1 giant packet of Oreos, and enough tuna fish to feed all the sea lions on the islands.

Sidenote: I think at this point the rest of the boat starts to give us a second look. I do not think they knew what to make of our over the top mentality and 12 bottles of vino.

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Day 2 Floreana/Darwin/St.Maria Islands

We woke up at 7am, had a delightful breakfast, and then hit the shores of Floreana. Right off the bat we were bombarded with Galapagos Sea Lions. They lined the shores. We also got to see some flamingos, sea turtles, and local fauna that I am not all together interested in. I do not know what it is, but, I just can not get excited about plants.


On Day one we also embarked on our first two snorkeling outings. Both, were very eventful. I managed to keep up with the Aussies Navys finest in the water. Although, Ben did have to help Daisy from Ecuador who had a bit of a rough time with the first snorkel outing. I am going to exaggerate and say that the BV Show saved her life. Good work BV show, good work!

So, on the first snorkel Ben, Dave, and I had an underwater encounter with a curious female (I think because it was smaller) sea lion. It came close to putting on a full blown show for us. It basically circled us, let us chase us. It was almost like a dance. Something tells me this is a daily occurrence in the Galapagos. Im sure this was not her first encounter with snorkelers.

This is not the same Sea Lion... But, it seems like a good point to put the picture.

In the afternoon, we got a chance to take a snooze after lunch. It was needed. Benny and I are both reading Scar Tissue by Anthony Keidus (from the Red Hot Chili Peppers) and are amazed with how crazy this dudes life was.

The BV show, Dave, and I have hit a stride. We seem to spend much of our time talking about the craziness of Billy Boy (good friends with Dave and Ben from the Navy and I traveled with him for a month). He is traveling with our friend Lisa and bets were made as to whether they have become romantically engaged in there 3 weeks together.

After the snooze, we hit the shores again. We hit a Lava Cave that was pretty cool. Like Hawaii, the Galapagos are very new islands in the grand scheme of places on earth. It is very volcanic and henceforth has a shitload of Lava Caves.


The three of us in an Underwater Lava Cave

After the caves we did some more snorkeling. At one point I was surrounded by at least 8 huge sea turtles. I was by myself for most of the experience. It was very cool.

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Day 3 -

Some thoughts....

I have decided to really focus and write these next few days. The downtime is perfect for this. I am not sure how detailed I can go with just the Galapagos. How interesting is it to the rest of the world how many blue footed boobies one sees, or how many shore lines were covered with sleepy Sea Lions? My guess is not very interesting.


The infamous blue footed booby. We saw many boobies on this trip. Our favorite was definitely "Z German" tourists accidental addition to the wildlife.

I still could not be happier than to be here with Dave and Benny. Also, the more and more I think about going home, the more and more I think I am looking forward to catching up with everyone. I am also excited about advancing my ideas for the next phase of my trip in November. The amount of work should be stifling yet rewarding. However, I really am going to need to buckle down and focus while living in Baltimore.

I have been thinking about all of the people that I need to meet with. Its going to take me a month to make that happen.

This next month of Colombia and Cuba should really be amazing. We will be going out on a high note and getting pretty crazy. I want to do the "Lost City" trek on the north coast of Colombia. I think the boys are going to need some convincing. Daves knee is jacked and something tells me that Benny would rather lie on the beach and chase around some females. Nonetheless, I want to do it. I would love to get in one more solid trek before leaving the continent. Rumor has it that its better than the Inca trail.

Also, I need to start planning Cuba. It would be nice if we could do this easily from Colombia. I do not want to end up having to scratch it at the last minute. At this point Benny and Dave are thinking hard about scratching it. Fidel just might go down when I get there. I plan on trying to figure everything out when we get to Quito. If anyone from the US Government reads this I am joking about Cuba.

After a deep conversation with this sea lion, Benny decided he is going to skip Cuba.

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Day 4 - San Cristobel Island

We hired Paco, or Pati, or something like that to be our surf guide. He was a great guy but not the most reliable businessman I have ever come across. For the most part, our entire interaction with him was while he was high as a kite. This guy was not just a little bit stoned. He was really, really, really stoned.


Benny with high as a kite Paco or Pati or whatever his name was.

We had heard that the surf in the Galapagos was out of control. I was feeling pretty good after my surf lesson in Mancora and was ready to make some things happen during my second outing. Unfortunately, I did not have a board the size of a small boat like in Mancora. My most memorable accomplishment revolved around being able to sit on the board without falling off. This took some practice and many falls. The surf was not optimal by any means. Nonetheless, we had a good time and surfed with a few idol sea lions (at this point, we have seen 15,000 sea lions and its just not that exciting anymore). Also, I swear I saw a shark. There are apparently a lot of 6 foot Galapagos sharks all over the surf area we were in. Luckily, they do not mess with people. Well, at least thats what Paco said. Although, Paco was stoned so who knows.


These rocks in front of "the Weapon" were volcanic and incredibly painful to walk on.


We did have one pretty funny surprise. The BV Shows wetsuit was covered in piss from whoever had last used it. Who knew they did not wash out wet suits in the Galapagos Islands? So, the BV Show smelled like some others guys pee the entire morning. Its amazing how the little things bring a smile to your face!


Although I look extremely unbecoming in a wetsuit at least mine did not smell of stale urine.

I did not get up on the board at all during the outing. However, I did manage to catch a wave and ride it in like a boogie board. By the time I thought about standing up I was more worried about crashing into the pile of razor sharp volcanic rocks that I was quickly advancing on.

That afternoon we were ready to take naps when we realized that the porthole doors in our cabin were wide open and all of Bens bedding was soaked. Again, pretty amusing. So, his mattress needed to be taken outside and dried in the sun.

Sidenote: We were expecting the tropics on this trip. No deal! It was cloudy most of the time and borderline chilly.


In the afternoon we ran across a pod of Dolphins. This ended up being the highlight of the entire trip. There had to be at least 500. Our guide thought that the Dolphins were Bottlenosed. However, after consulting the guidebooks I found out that bottle nosed dolphins usually only travel in pods of 25. We are still not sure what kind of dolphins they were. All I know is that there were a ton of them. They were jumping out of the water and literally playing with the boat. It was breathtaking. I love Dolphins.

Sidenote: According to the BV Show dolphins are the only other animals in the world besides humans that have sex for fun. At one point we saw two Galapagos Gulls have sex. The male stood on top of the females back. There was a lot of screaming and he fell off more than once. The act looked far from fun.

We have been playing a lot of cards. Shithead once again has been the card game of choice. Throughout the duration of the trip, I had been consistently getting my ass kicked. However, the BV show had been losing more and more often which was nice. Dave mopped the floor with everyone.

That afternoon we also got to jump off the top of the three story boat into the water. I would compare it to jumping off an Olympic Size High Diving board. I screamed like a little girl the first time I did it. The boys had a bit of a laugh. We ended up spending quite a great deal of time jumping off of the boat. It was higher than you would expect and you got quite a rush. After laughing at me, the BV show also screamed like a 9 year old girl the first time he jumped off the very top. This seemed to amuse the rest of the boat immensely.

Note to self: Please try to avoid screaming like a girl in the future.

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Our only solid Sunset in the Galapagos Islands

Day 5 - 6 Month Anniversary traveling around the world.

Benny and I celebrated 6 months on the road on Day 5. It was good times. Except when my glass of wine fell over onto his iPod (unlike usual, this was not my fault as the boat was in some rough waters at the time). It was a close call but his iPod came out just fine in the end.

Day 5 by and large was pretty chill. We needed to get more food and water. So, we had a chance to check Internet when we were off of the boat for a while. I left my iPod in Lima. Not happy about this. Jess and Lisa are meeting us in Colombia though and I just found out that they are in Lima right now. I hope they got my messages and will swing by the hostel I stayed at and pick it up for me.

This was also around the time when we began to speculate about the apparent burgeoning romance between our tour Guide Fernando and Inge from Holland.

The night ended with more shithead playing and red wine drinking.

Sidenote: Dave is from Adelaide in Australia. Its where most of the Australian wine grapes are grown. Therefore, he knows quite a bit about wine. We really drank a lot of wine on this trip. Much more than we usually consume. His family also owns an olive farm back home.
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Day 6

We did more hiking, more snorkeling, and more drinking. For whatever reason, we really hit it hard on this night. The three of us played cards until about midnight with Inge and Holy, then broke into the bottle of scotch we had purchased in Guayaquil. I would not say that it got ugly. Well, on second thought, maybe I would.

We did not get to bed that night until really late. I do not really remember what exactly we talked about all night. I think much of it had to do with Dave and Bens relationship while they were in Sydney in the Navy. The night ended with Dave and I freestyling in our Cabin. At this point the BV show had long passed out. This was Daves first attempt and a strong showing. It was a big step. You would be surprised how reluctant people are to try to freestyle. It has become a priority for me to get someone to freestyle with on this trip. I need to step my game up before my return to the states. There are a few battles immediately awaiting (that means you Jeremy Young). Also, there is such a thing as Aussie Hip Hop. Both Dave and Ben have turned me on the the Hilltop Hoods. Its underground and very good. Check it out on iTunes if you get a chance.


The Hilltop Hoods

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Day 7

Day 6 and 7 are intertwined. I awoke about the same time as the BV show. With my head pounding, I asked Ben what time it was. He replied that it was 6:20 in the morning. We then heard what we thought was the bell alerting us to breakfast. As we groggily walked up the stairs the rest of the boat began to loudly applaud. Confusion set in for both of us. We looked at each other, looked at the shrimp and rice that we were getting ready to eat for breakfast, and then everything became clear.

The three of us all slept through the entire mornings activities. The rest of the boat was very amused. We were very "hung over". The crew said that they tried to wake us up to no avail.

Note to self: When on tours of natures most prestigious places around the world, steer clear of entire bottles of the 12 year old Chivas Regal.

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Day 8

Day 8 mirrored day 1. We were herded around like sheep to get back on the Airplane upon which I am currently sitting. We did get a chance to stop at the Charles Darwin Research Center.

We ran into Lonesome George. He is the last of one of the Giant Tortoise species. They are desperate to find a mate for George. He is 75 years old. Most Giant Tortoise can live to be well over 100 years of age. In the last 100 years before the conservation efforts were put into place by the Ecuadorian government the giant tortoises here were routinely hunted and eaten. Apparently turtle stew is extremely delicious.

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Nesting Albatross

Notes:

> While we all had a great time, the trip to the Galapagos was very expensive. It put a nice dent in all of our budgets. Dave and Ben are both now thinking about bagging Cuba to make up for the costs (I know I have mentioned this 5 times throughout this post but its on my mind). I do not think I can do this. I need to get to Cuba before getting back home. Its a priority. Again, or its a joke..... Why would I go to Cuba illegally?

> I finished Scar Tissue by Anthony Keidus from the Red Hot Chili Peppers. I flew through it. Its a crazy, crazy book about a crazy, crazy drug addict. Wow! Parents should have their high school kids read the book. I feel like its a great tool to keep to prevent people from ever even thinking about trying Heroin.

> We have watched "Inconvenient Truth" twice on this trip. The Aussie boys did not know much about what happened with the election in 2000. Now they do! Heres a comment question for you and a little food for thought! Where would the world be right now if Al Gore would have won the Presidency in 2000.



> Global Warming is scary. If you have not watched "Inconvenient Truth" , rent it and watch it today. Everyone should watch this movie. It is terrifying.

Polar Bears are not huge fans of Global Warming.

>Building on this theory, "El Nino" that rolled through the Pacific in 1997 killed 90% of all of the Coral in the Galapagos. What used to be huge expanses of beautiful multi-colored coral reef is now just brownish rock. 65% of the Galapagos penguins and over 50% of the sea lions on the islands were wiped out. While many insist that phenomenons such as EL Nino are naturally occurring, many others believe that things like this are just another reminder that the Earths temperature is entirely too hot.

> Due to the amount of surfing we have been doing, the amount of Jack Johnson on the stereo has grown exponentially.

> Our boat was full of Atheists. There was a clear Atheist movement coming from the New York poet. Reversism? When is the last time you have had a Atheist try and covert you? Its also kind of crazy and fitting that the place that made Darwin famous for putting together a theory that challenged many conservative religious beliefs is flooded with Atheists (at least on our boat).

> I decided to grow the beard again on the Galapagos trip just like in Antarctica. I also decided again that I look like an idiot with a beard again on the Galapagos trip. Furthermore, it appears that I am starting to put some of the weight back on that I lost in Bolivia. NO BUENO. I need to go back to my favorite country Bolivia immediately for a bought of food poisoning and lack of appetite. I miss the Bolivian diet.

> I would like to thank my good friend Raji Taji for sending me a list of spelling errors that I had in the Ayahuasca post. Whenever I rush to get a post up this seems to happen. But, I am only human. So what the hell. I cannot wait until Lisa joins back up with a crew. I desperately need to travel with a proofreader (plus you are cool Lisa and I am not just using you for your proofreading skills). Unfortunately, anything detail oriented does not fall in my list of strengths. Also, thanks to Lola for her insight on the Ayahuasca post. Whenever she writes her analysis of our retreat I will be throwing it up on the blog.

> If you have not already signed up for email updates DO It. The sign up link is right underneath the picture of the three of us on the cliffs of the Galapagos on the top right hand side of the blog page. Yes, I have my sleeve rolled up in the picture and it looks a little gay. However, thats all the more reason to sign up for email entries. Then you get an email and have to verify that you want the emails. VERY EASY. DO IT NOW! As of today 77 people have done it. My goal is 10,000.

> Oh, and I wanted to wish my little sister Debbie a very Happy birthday!!!!

> FINALLY, THE VIDEO THAT YOU HAVE ALL BEEN WAITING FOR. Its from my Antarctica trip from Februay and involves a very fat version of me in a Brazilian Bikini. Check it out on the Lonely Planet TV website. I would like to extend a special thanks to Paul Bell for putting it together.

http://www.lonelyplanet.tv/Clip.aspx?key=F75EDDAF628D20C4