Drugged in San Pedro de Atacama

The Atacama Desert



When the Aussies, Raj Majal, and I were planning our Salt Flats excursion we were told repeatedly by many other backpackers that San Pedro in Chile was a must see. Many of the tours of Salar de Uyuni start in Uyuni and end up in Chile. Furthermore, none of the other guys have been to Chile, so we decided to make our final destination from the Salt Flats San Pedro de Atacama.

San Pedro does not appear on most maps of Chile, but lies in the very north of the skinniest country in the world in the mineral rich Atacama desert. Although it is a very small town, it is also a backpackers paradise. The streets are lined with travel agencies and niche restaurants. At night, all of the restaurants burn huge bonfires right in the middle of the restaurants. It's a beautiful place.

Ben and I were set to spend our 5 month anniversary traveling on Saturday night in San Pedro. Massive plans were made. The initial plan was to take it easy on Thursday night and to celebrate to the fullest on both Friday and Saturday night.

Unfortunately, things did not materialize as we expected.

The four of us went out to eat at one of the nicest restaurants, Adobe, on Thursday night. The four of us had a very big meal and started off like any night with a few beers.

This is where things began to get weird. Continuing to follow normal protocol, we switched over to vodka & sprites (I usually drink vodka with soda but trying to get people down here to understand what club soda is can be more than a challenge).

The vodka drinks arrived and the four of us began to get drunk much faster than we normally would have.

Sidenote: Aside from Raji Taj, who is much smaller than the Aussies and me, we are all big and have had plenty of experience in the "handling your alcohol department".

The first indicator:

After a few more drinks, Dave "the Weapon" Mallet fell straight back off of his chair and got a beautiful view of the stars. Personally, I barely remember Dave doing this.

The second indicator:

Apparently we were hanging out with two American guys ( one of them had just won $64,000 playing poker in Vegas) and they picked up our entire tab for the evening. Between the four of us, the tab was easily over $200 bucks US. The guys actually commented on the blog a few posts back saying that it was nice to meet us and such. (If you guys are reading this, thanks for hooking it up).

Out of the four of us, only Raj has a slight recollection of this. The next day we all woke up wondering if we ran out on the bill.

The third indicator:

Ben and I apparently ended up in some sort of wrestling match in the middle of the street. Neither of us remember. I hit my head hard. His eye and hand were really screwed up for a few days.

Sidenote: Ben and I, simply put, do not do this kind of shit. We have been here for 5 months and if anything, work to prevent blind drunk assholes from partaking in this kind of behavior.

The fourth indicator:

Late that night we were apparently approached by 6 Chileans who had unkind things to say to us in Spanish. Unfortunately, Raj translated what they were talking about to us and Ben took off after all 6 guys. They kept walking. Again, Ben does not behave in this matter.

The fifth indicator:

"The Weapon" completely disappeared. He has no recollection of what happened. He remembers being in a different bar for awhile, and that's it. For the next couple days he was approached by different groups of people telling him to "be careful in San Pedro". This is where we began to think something was seriously wrong.

The next day Raj and I were flat on our backs all day long. This was not a normal hangover. Dave and Ben did not feel as bad, and actually went sandboarding. I was violently sick (maybe the second time since traveling). We think we all got different amounts of the special sauce.

The conclusion:

We were drugged. None of us are sure why. We look like any other backpacker. Why someone would drug 4 guys is beyond our comprehension.

We asked Ben and Daves' sandboarding guide if stuff like this happens in San Pedro. He said that it was not unheard of.

After further analysis, we think that they did not give us enough of "whatever it was that they spiked our vodkas with" to make it possible to rob us. Fortunately, we all stuck together and made it back safely to our hostel.

The next few nights we ate dinner out but took it easy. Mostly to avoid a run-in with the Chilean Mafia...if such a thing exists.

This my friends, is the weirdest thing that has happened since I have been traveling.


Riding in San Pedro de Atacama

On the bright side, we did have a fantastic afternoon horseback riding on the sand dunes surrounding the city. We saw some beautiful volcanoes, dunes, and sunsets.
It was also very humorous when Raj fell off of his horse.

Then, we got the hell out of there, never to return again.

Just a little note from my two Aussie friends, Raji Taj, and me:

F YOU San Pedro de Atacama! F You and all of your drink spiking residents!!!!


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Notes:

> After talking to the owner of the Hostel in Cusco, he told me there have been many nights when local "girls" have spiked his drinks. He says that whenever he starts feeling a little strange he gets the hell out of there. Although, we did not run into many girls that night in San Pedro. Maybe one of the culprits had a secret crush on the BV show.

> After San Pedro, the Raj Mahal took off on an alternative route. He has about a month or so left of traveling and headed out to Salta in northern Argentina. Raji Taj brought much to the table in the three weeks that we hung out. Not only did his fluent Spanish make life easy, he also brought a completely different dynamic to the crew. We have all been talking about how much we miss Raji Taji and wish him the best of luck when he gets back to London and to the real world. Something tells me that after making the British Pound Sterling for a few years, Raj will be back on the backpacker scene once again. He was also an amazing proof reader. Clearly, if anyone needs an amazing proofreader it's me. Raj is fantastic with commas.

> OK, so we boogied out of San Pedro for a strategic two day strike of Arequipa and Colca Canyon in southern Peru.

> Although this can seem like an extension of the little unlucky patch I went through a few weeks back, I disagree. The reason nothing bad happened is because the boys and I stuck together (except for Dave as he wandered off for a bit, this does not matter as much because I am sure he could take out the entire town of San Pedro de Atacama by himself). Nonetheless, South America affords you the luxury of making mistakes. I would much rather make as many mistakes as possible here, so when I get to Africa I am the ultimate backpacker. From what I gather, there is much less room for forgiveness on "The Mother Continent".

Note to self: Improve your skills of identifying dodgy characters in bars.

Needless to say, my horse suffered immensely throughout the entire ride.

Note to self: I need the big horse in the future

Salar De Uyuni ¨The Bolivian Salt Flats¨

In front of Colarada Lagoon

The Boys in front of one of the Many Volcanoes


The Salt Flats of Bolivia is by and large the weirdest place I have ever been in my entire life. It felt like we were on an entirely different planet. There are miles, and miles, and miles of just salt. The bizarre nature of this place got even crazier when we visited coral reef caves, massive red sanded deserts, volcanoes galore, red lagoons, and flamingos. We also got up close and personal with a really weird French dude.

Sidenote: I have come to the conclusion that France should be on a completely different planet (more on this later).

Salar de Uyuni is the worlds largest Salt Flat at 4085 square miles. Its also just over 3500 meters high. At the highest point of our tour we reached just over 5000 meters. Needless to say, the altitude effects you on the Salt Flats.

Over 40,000 years ago the entire area was a part of a major prehistoric lake. Eventually the lake dried and left behind the many bizarre aforementioned sites.

Raj Mahal, Dave, The BV Show and I decided to go with an upgrade tour company to do the Salt Flat Tour. Basically, we had heard a ridiculous amount of complaints from other backpackers about how cold it would be. It became evident how desperately we needed heat in our four-wheel drive truck. We spent 3 straight days in a cramped, yet heated Toyota Landcruiser. Thank God because it was just as freezing as everyone said!

Our crew consisted of our driver Orlando, our cook Lourdes, and a lone Frenchman that did not speak a word of English. The BV show lovingly dubbed him "Frenchy" from the start of the trip and it stuck. Surprisingly, Frenchy seemed to enjoy his nickname.

Our first day coming from the town of Uyuni was through the actual "Salt Flats". It was mind blowing. As far as the eye could see, we saw nothing but salt, salt, and more salt. At some points we actually came close to getting stuck in the salt. At its worst, I would compare it to driving through 6 inches of fresh snow. For the most part the salt was flat and smooth. We also stopped off at the Salt Museum in Uyuni. Everything, including the walls, was made of Salt.

Dave examining the proportions of a female Salt Statue in the "Salt Museum" in Uyuni

The Salt Flats are a photographers wet dream. We had some fun with the scenery.













Just before sunset at the end of day one of the tour Orlando took us to a coral reef. It used to be at the bottom of the Prehistoric lake before the tectonic plates shifted fifty gabillion years ago when the Andes were formed.




Sidenote: Orlando did not speak a lick of English. So, some of the fine details of what we were seeing were for the most part lost in translation. If someone actually knows when the tectonic plates shifted hit me up on the comment board.


Next to the Coral Reef Cave was a Pre-Incan cemetery. Apparently someone died in the Cave in the last twenty years, hence the cross. Yes, I took this award winning photograph.

The next two days sort of blurred together. We stayed in reasonably good accommodations, drank a fair bit of red wine at night, and played "shithead" (the most popular card game on the road).



After we got through the Salt Flats the Volcanoes rapidly arrived. They were literally everywhere. From my knowledge, 98 percent of the Volcanoes we saw were inactive.



Out of nowhere we came upon rock formations isolated in the desert. The picture above is the craziest by far.

On the rest of the tour we saw a red lagoon, a green lagoon, and more desert. Some of the regular lagoons had a few random flamingos. Apparently the lakes act as their breeding grounds in November.

When you are stuck in the car with people for almost 72 hours, you really get to know people. Dave, Raj, Ben, and I enjoyed some great conversations.


> I learned that Ben and Dave both hate driving slow (Orlando drove like a moderately aggressive grandmother).

>I learned that Dave knows a lot about cars. This came up when our car broke down on day 2 about 6 times.

>I learned that our driver Orlando does not like listening to gringos telling him how to fix his car.

> Most importantly, I learned that both Dave and the BV show have serious gastrointestinal issues in the altitude. They blew up the car consistently throughout the entire duration of the trip. Orlando and our cook were not amused.

Sidenote: I know as much about cars as I do about chaos theory math. So, when the car broke down., Dave had "Raji Taj" translate to Orlando what he thought was wrong with the car. Orlando, did not listen and found it necessary to remove many strange looking parts. It was a time of high drama and I got the hell out of there. There were too many pissed off cooks in the kitchen.


Dave trying to communicate what he thought was wrong.


I walked a quarter of a mile up the road and chilled. I saw a weird rabbit-like thing that seemingly jumped 10 yards at a time clearing huge rocks. Either that or there was some left over Ayahuasca in my system.

Every morning, Frenchy (his actual name is Francois) got into the car 15 minutes before the rest of us every day to claim his prided window seat. Oh yeah, this was annoying. On the last day, Raji Taj jumped in the seat early and beat him to the punch, throwing Frenchies day into a complete tailspin. We all found this amusing. Frenchy...not so much.

Sidenote: Out of all the people from all over the world I have traveled with, I find the French to be the most ridiculous. In fact, most of the French I have met have been downright terrible. The stereotypes I have had in my head about the French before this trip seem to be confirming themselves. French people also seem to have a funny, yet annoying laugh.

Sidenote: If anyone has any funny stories about French people. Please feel free to post them. It would be most amusing and wonderful. If you are French and reading this, please feel free to post funny stories about your fellow French countrymen as well.

Playing cards in the shelter with Frenchy. On night two Frenchy got on the drink hard! He also won every game of cards we played.


At one point, we stopped to look at some llama-like things. Orlando clearly instructed us not to get out of the car. Of course, Frenchy jumped right out and started taking pictures. Afterwards, when driving off, Frenchy realized that a piece of his camera had fallen into the desert. We went back and assumed a search. Somehow, by the grace of "tiny 8 pound 6 ounce lord baby Jesus", we found the missing piece.



In summary, the Salt Flats were impressive. Just like everything else in Bolivia, it was REALLY cheap as well. Overall, we ended up being not very happy with the Oasis tour company. The primary reason for our feelings co-inside directly with the breakdowns.


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Notes:



My flag motif on my backpack is coming along nicely. I should have three more flags before my triumphant return to Baltimore.

> Ben and Dave have effectively nicknamed me "the consumer" largely due to my care free attitude towards money.


The BV show has made this picture both his Myspace and Facebook Profile Pic. Just thought I would add it to further contribute to the "Gay Ben Vears Pictures Gallery" that appears to be forming within this blog.

> I am way backed up on the blog. Lack of internet assess is a biatch. Look for a flurry of posts this week. Heres a little sneak peak:

- Drugged!!!! In San Pedro de Atacama. The story about how two Aussies, one giant American, and one Brit got their drinks spiked in the Chilean desert. Also, I will download VIDEO of horseback riding through the desert in San Pedro.

- Condors!!!! Condors are large beautiful birds. We saw a ton in Colca Canyon outside of Arequipa in Peru. I AM going to upload some video.

- American Beauty!!! I will walk you through the complete mental breakdown of a middle aged, white trash American on our Colca Canyon Tour.

- A reunion in Cusco!!! The story of three days of heavy celebrating in Cusco with the BV show, Davey Mallet, Billy, and Jess (from Rurrenabaque).

> I am on a bus tomorrow to La Paz AGAIN. I am traveling with an American girl named Lisa for the next couple of days. We may stop off on Isla Del Sol for a night on Lake Titicaca. I am going back for a four day retreat in the mountains surrounding La Paz with a certain Shaman named Tim. Ben, Dave and I have to be in the Galapagos on July 5th. So, we are still finalizing the details of what we are doing between now and then. We could end up in the Bolivian Jungle again. Or, we could end up surfing the beaches of Northern Peru. We are not quite sure yet but we are working up a plan.

> Afro Update: This past week I have had a major break through with my Afro. It is basically at the point of complete perfection. This is the result of much consultation with Afro specialists from around the world.

> Although the next two months are shaping up to be really amazing, I am really looking forward to getting back home for a few months in August to see everyone. It's going to be a blast.